Dirty stinking socks
I've been feeling quite depressed lately, which is not like me at all. My brother (23) came to live with us a few months ago, promising to stay only 4 weeks, which turned into more like 10 weeks. After a while I found myself getting quite annoyed with him (my brother is a real tear away) and I wanted him to leave so we found him a flat and he moved out.
Since he left I have found myself missing him, which is really stupid, because I was so desperate for him to go at first. My friends visit the house and always comment on how empty it feels now he is gone, despite the fact that I have two adult flatmates, my partner and my daughter living with me. It just doesn't feel like a home anymore without his loud heavy metal music, dirty stinking socks he used to pile on the front porch (!!) and his long haired misfit beer swilling friends hanging around. What's wrong with me? Do you think I should ask him to move in when we get our own place in August?
Loving Sister (Perth)
Dear Loving sister,
Definitely not!! You need to adjust your surroundings back to normality i.e. family life, It probably sounds very boring, but its what you have to do.
Your temporary feelings of "missing your wild brother" will fade away. It's nice to have a bit of fun around the house sometimes I agree, but it will get on your nerves again!
Why not invite him over once a week for a beer, watch the game on TV, a barbecue etc. You invite your friends and ask him to invite some of his (if you could stand it). That way you will have his company on a regular basis, fun and all!!
Although if he has a place of his own you can suggest alternate weeks at each others houses, He will soon realise the expense, time, noise and possibly mess left after a visit, and may even calm down and stop being so wild!
Oh, by the way you're not depressed, you are a loving sister who enjoys your family's company and that's a rare thing these days. Don't lose it. Your family are and should be the most important, secure, focus on anyone's life these days.