Taking me for a ride!
Alan Baldwin wrote:
Hi, I need help on a relationship problem. Last October, I split with my fiancee of two years after I realised that she was taking me for a ride and using me for everything she could get. I paid for everything, was at her beckon call all the time, worked my arse off so I could give her money to go out etc. She also had our child aborted without even consulting me, which still hurts me to this day.
Anyway, I regained my life, knuckled down at uni. and got on with things. recently, I found myself attracted to a girl at my university and a mutual friend said she liked me also. Last Friday was my birthday and we finally got together. However the next day I took her out, and as I've not done this sort of thing for 2 1/2 years, I came on too strong and I think I scared her off. I want to tell her my past, but don't want her to think she should go out with me sympathetically.
What should I do?
Thanks, Al
Hi Al,
You say you came on too strong? Exactly what do you mean by that? Did you try it on with her? did you get shirty with her? what?
I always think that telling your new mate things about your past is well really not good, unless she seems to be treating you the same as your `ex that is and then you can remind her that you wouldn't let anyone walk over you gain like that. It will either scare her and shell run off knowing that she will treat you the same or shell say she's not going to be like that and you two can have a relationship together o your own terms. if she really likes you then shell go out with you because of yourself and nothing more, you have to like the person your dating if not what's the point in seeing them? right?
You like her? yes? she likes you? then that's a perfect recipe for love and a relationship, take things slow at first don't get too involved and please don't spend everything you earn on her, its your money let her pay for something its only fair really, don't end up the way it was and be used and abused and ignored all the time its your life you enjoy it your way. Be good to the girl that's food to you and you cant go wrong, but do keep your money in your pocket too.
Regards
Caroline